Thankfully I have never had an Article 15, however, I have had the privilege to witness the dumbest ways to earn them.

A1C, then Amn, Then Aiman Basic Bruner- Famous for making up stories and being unable to count to 10. I HATED this Gomer and would have an extra hour of work every single night just to undo what he did. At one point, he had to be escorted from wake-up to lights out and watched over while he pulled weeds. Seriously.

This guy gets drunk, underage, in the dorms, says something stupid to another airman, and winds up getting two black eyes. Guess he had to be told twice. Shows up the next day, supervisor asked what happened, and he told the truth in it's entirety. facepalm

Since he self confessed, the Commander wanted to go easy on him and give him an LOR instead of the Article 15. On the day he was to report and sign it, he SKIPPED the appointment so he could be present for the dorm wide room inspection. LOR just turned into an Article 15.

So, he loses a stripe, pay, and is restricted to base for 30 days.

Story ends here right? Nope. 2 weeks go by and he decides he needs a loan, so he goes to the bank off base, applies for a loan, and puts the Commander as a reference. Guess who the bank called. Commander cut his remaining stripe off the very next day. That was how he earned his second Article 15. Right after the first. He was kicked out not too long after that.

I have other stories of idiocracy, with not only this Airman, but others if anyone is interested.

Here's my guide on how to not get AR 15:

Step 1; Don't be a fuck up.

Step 2; if a fuck up, don't get caught.

Step 2.5; if caught, determine whether person wants an apology (Step 4) or wants to destroy you (Step3).

Step 3; if caught, admit nothing, deny everything, and make counteraccusations.

Step 4; if caught, tell them you have 0 excuse and that you're fully prepared to serve your punishment.

Step 5; Have a Ranger Tab or be extremely good looking.

Step 6; If unable to follow past 5.5 Steps, utilize the dirt you collected on everybody for the past two years as leverage.

Step 7; after that fails, make an elaborate plan that includes helping the freedom fighters in Ukraine and ultimately ends with you being captured in Africa after fighting in the Civil War.

Step 8; get captured by the CIA and transported to the states while wearing raggidy ass OCPs.

Step 9; make a post about how the CIA incriminated you with CP charges.

Step 10; Enjoy maximum security prison.

Congrats you successfully avoided an AR 15.

Open door your Company Command Team. I'm sure they'll love to hear about this. Have your phone call-log typed up, have a written account of everything that happened, have the SD Runners and S6 ready to back you up. State that you're being unfairly singled out, targeted, punished, hazed, bullied, and whatever else by your PSG.

If that doesn't work, go to your BN Command team.

Burn It All Down