Thank you for posting this 😢 More on reddit.com

I didn’t think him vivisecting animals would lead to this…. More on reddit.com

I desperately needed to hear this today. I think we all can do some good in this world, to try and make it a better place, and to not be apathetic about things going on around us. Despite how dark the timeline feels sometimes, like she says. More on reddit.com

So my insurance covered one of those fancy hands free pumps you can shove in a bra or tank top for my second kid. My first kid, it was like a single boob horn situation. And I was so happy. Because this thing, I could shove down a nursing top and control with my phone instead of hooking up to tubes and buttons and a whole thing. Except it made me miserable. Now, I had a fun thing called DMER, which is Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex, which made me feel like the world was ending right before my milk dropped. So I would be going along, maybe baby would cry, maybe not, maybe the kid would even be on tit, and I would get weak in the knees, hand to chest, couldn’t speak, overwhelmingly sad. Like take your breath away, couldn’t move, couldn’t even cry, despondent. Then my tits would buzz and the milk would come in and I was fine. This was not that. I was miserable. I felt violated. I was pumping milk for a thing I loved. I had another thing that did the same job. But this contraption made me angry. It didn’t hurt. It did its job. But I found the minutes stretching out. I could walk and talk and eat, but I didn’t want to. When it was on, I became shrill, uncomfortable without being able to say why, deeply disturbed to my core but without a place to label it. I’d find myself wringing my hands, grinding my teeth, my shoulders would creep up to my ears. Once I got them off I would relax, focus on the numbers, which weren’t as good as the one with all the tubes and horns. But I remember crying at one point. If literally any cow feels like this, this is hell on earth. This is torture. I’d rather someone break all of my bones because at some point, they’d run out of bones. Twenty minutes multiple times a day felt like lifetimes. Finally I had to resort to either kid on tit or the old school pump, because I wasn’t even a person with it on. And no one has asked a dairy cow how she feels. The relief in the first bit, sure, getting the pressure off, but then, is she just standing there miserable, uncomfortable but not in a way she could name, contemplating her own death and how soon it could come? Because DMER sucked, it sucks, it is not talked about enough, but I was sad about everyone and everything dying. Those stupid pumps, even though I put them on, I was waiting for the way out. I wasn’t sad about dying, I was fine if it happened, just to end the experience. But again, no one asks the cows. More on reddit.com